Talking to Your Partner About Low T

Was this helpful?
middle aged couple embracing

If you've been diagnosed with low testosterone, or low T, and you're in a relationship, you need to talk with your partner. Symptoms of low T—like less interest in sex, problems with erections, lack of energy, and irritability—are most likely noticeable to the other person. It’s a problem for both of you to address.

Be Open and Honest

Shutting out your partner and shutting in your feelings are sure to make things worse. It can be embarrassing to talk about sexual issues, but you don't want to damage your relationship. The first step is to think about low testosterone symptoms as medical issues, not signs of weakness. Once you're open about low T, you can start working together toward a solution.

Maintain Intimacy

Intimacy depends on honesty and trust. Remember that intimacy is not just about sex. You can maintain intimacy in your relationship by interacting in other ways, like through sexual contact that doesn't involve intercourse. Enjoy touching and kissing, important forms of sexual intimacy.

Tips for Talking

Learning about the causes and the symptoms of low T is a good starting point. You and your partner should know that low T is a common condition. It affects about 5 million adult males in the United States. Also, remember that symptoms of low T may be reversed with testosterone therapy. Don’t let a lack of communication damage your relationship in the meantime.

Try these tips to get the conversation started:

  • Make sure you have all your facts about low T straight.

  • Pick a place and a time to talk that gives you enough time and enough privacy.

  • Talk about your feelings as well as your symptoms.

  • Be a good listener and be open to positive feedback.

  • Talk about ways to be intimate that don’t involve sexual intercourse.

  • If you have emotional issues that are blocking your ability to talk, consider working with a therapist. Find one who is familiar with low T and reduced sex drive.

  • Be positive and work together.

  • Bring up the idea of visiting your health care provider together to get more facts and talk about a treatment plan.

Working Together

Low T doesn't have to be a lifetime sentence. Many men can benefit from treatment. Ask your health care provider if you might be one of them. Low testosterone therapy may help restore your desire for sex and your sexual performance. It can also help you feel better about yourself.

Don’t forget that intimacy is the key to a good relationship, and intimacy is more than sex. Find ways to spend time together. Share experiences, feelings, and ideas. Enjoy the simple pleasures of a touch or a kiss.

Key Takeaways

  • Trying to hide low T from your partner can make things worse.

  • Open and honest discussion can make things better.

  • Intimacy is about more than sex.

  • Talk with your health care provider or a therapist if you need help.

Was this helpful?
Medical Reviewer: William C. Lloyd III, MD, FACS
Last Review Date: 2020 Jul 28

  1. How to Talk to Your Partner About Erectile Dysfunction, Cleveland Clinic. (;

  2. Male Hypogonadism, Cleveland Clinic. (;

  3. Types of Intimacy, University of Florida Counseling and Wellness Center. (;

  4. Low Testosterone, NIH. (;

  5. Erectile Dysfunction: Rebuilding Intimacy, University of Minnesota Medical Center. (;

Explore Low Testosterone
  • You’ve probably seen commercials on TV addressing the symptoms of low testosterone, often called “Low-T”. Testosterone is a hormone responsible for male development, though it’s also present in lesser amounts in women. Produced mainly in the testicles, testosterone plays a role in hair and muscle growth, bone density, libido, sperm production, and red blood cell formation.
    September 30, 2016
  • Testosterone is the defining hormone for boys and men. It's responsible for male traits. Your body starts making testosterone when you're still in the womb. Testosterone production rises until about age 17. Then it starts to slowly fall in middle age. By age 80, your testosterone level will be half of what it once was. However, not having enough testosterone can affect you at any age.
    June 28, 2016
  • There can be bothersome symptoms of low T, but not all men with low T need treatment.
    June 27, 2016
  • The effects of low T are not just part of getting older. Talk to your doctor if you have any of these sexual or non-sexual symptoms.
    June 17, 2016
Recommended Reading
Next Up
Answers to Your Health Questions
Trending Videos